Hitting That Balance

How can a situation be so loud and yet in the scene underneath it all, so quiet? So much going on, it's a room full of color and yet all I see around is black and white. I suck the color from the room, replacing it with nothingness. I can see you staring and yet I feel you look through me like I'm a part of the wall behind me. I'm here but do you think I even exist? The conversations continue but im just there, apart of the wall. So I find myself going outside. Nothing changes as I go, I fear I'm too much of a loner. But outside it's just quiet and beautiful. I see the darkness dancing with the lightposts and the moonlight. The wind sweeps the trees and I watch the sway of the shades. Sometimes I wish I could join that contrast.